Mamacitas

Okay, so my sister just sent me this link to another blog with a devotion for moms. I just felt like it would encourage any of you, who like me, feel like you are royally screwing your kiddos up each day:) It gives me hope to know that I don't have to be June Cleaver to avoid big therapy bills for them later in life! Ha! Hope you enjoy and are encouraged by "Embracing Who I Am" as much as I did.

Sweet eWe!

Our sweet eWe officially completed her year at Miss Kate's Pre-K (MKPK) this week. It seems like just yesterday I posted her "first day of school" picture on this very blog! My, my! I must say, eWe was not one of those children that I felt like needed preschool for the learning or the social aspect. I did, however, feel like it would be helpful for her to sit under someone else's authority....someone with whom she couldn't pull the drama/emotional card. Miss Kate was definitely the right choice!

I also never intended to send her to everyday preschool. I was really looking for a 2 day/week program. It was a bit of a shocker for me to have her gone so much. I kind of feel like I went through what so many will go through when their kiddos go to Kindergarten. But, in the end I feel like it was great for her and very appropriate for me for the emotional year we've had. Thank you, Lord for knowing just what each of us needed and providing for it perfectly!

So, before I share the pictures let me just say to eWe....We are so very proud of you sweetheart. Certainly your biggest academic accomplishment this year has been reading. You decided that you loved words at a very young age. You talked non-stop, asked to be read to, pretended to read, and showed great interest in learning letters and their sounds. Then this year you truly took it to a whole new level by teaching yourself how to read. You amaze us everyday with your abilities!

You've also done such a great job respecting the authority of your teachers, following instructions, including other children and even pursuing them in friendships. You've learned about famous artists, foreign countries, numbers, letters, and all sorts of fun things. Perhaps, though, what I hope you take away most from this year (and me too, as I seem to struggle with this very thing) is that you can be most proud of yourself, not for succeeding, but for trying. You are so able and capable that you will not often meet with failure. And while that amazes me, I also pray that you don't find your worth in your abilities. I pray that you learn to handle failure well. I pray that you will take risks by trying things you don't think you will be good at. I pray that you will know that without Christ, all of your accomplishments are but rubbage. Do it for Him and through Him always, honey!

Okay, so on to the pictures.....

Their last day was "Pajama Day" at school. Here she is dressed and ready to go...





Here is our gang (minus me behind the camera) at the MKPK graduation pot-luck dinner.



And here is the dynamic duo serving up some yummy Shake's to all those parents and kiddos....I love that one kid asked for "just sprinkles, no ice cream". Way to know what you like and go for broke!



And last, but definitely not least....here is Miss Kate (a.k.a The World's GREATEST teacher) handing eWe her "diploma" and a little advice tailored just for her...."have fun in Kindergarten and keep on reading!"

55 minutes that might just change your life....

There are NOT words. The next 55 minutes of your life will not be wasted if you choose to follow this link and listen to what Rachel Barkey knows....

I'm trading it in, layin' it down....for the joy of the Lord is my strength!

A year ago today we were traveling down here to surprise my Mom for Mother's Day. That seems like ages ago. When we arrived at their house on Saturday morning, we tiptoed down the hall to her bedroom where she was just getting up. My Dad had intentionally left the double doors to their bedroom closed to help with the surprise. Yesterday as I opened those same doors to get something from Dad's room the sound of the creaking door took me right back to that moment. We opened them and she was standing next to her bed and we said, "Surprise, Happy Mother's Day!" She was surprised! And, although my Mom was not a woman given to expressing a lot of emotion outright, she spent the rest of the day telling others about her surprise visit. It was obvious that it blessed her.

We stayed for a few days. The next time I saw her was only a week later after having received the call from Dad saying that we need to come right away. I'm so thankful for that last visit at Mother's Day 2008! This one will probably prove to be my hardest, for sure. Will they ever be the same? But I was encouraged by the message from another blog I read, "Girltalk". If you have a chance to read it, click on the link and do so, but if you don't here is what I took from it as treasures...

"If He has purchased our salvation through the suffering and sacrifice of His son, we can trust that He is working good in the midst of our suffering.

May I encourage you to pour out your heart to the Lord of love? He knows, He sees, and he hears. Your tears are not lost on your heavenly Father. He is the compassionate Lord who urges you to draw near to Him. “I, I am he who comforts you” he declares (Is. 51:12).

It was said of Jonathan Edwards that even in the midst of being falsely accused and persecuted his “happiness was out of the reach of his enemies.” Your loss may be much greater, but the truths of the cross can also put your happiness out of the reach of your sorrows."

So, can I have a HAPPY Mother's Day? I'm not sure. I'm one who LOVES any reason to celebrate others, and even have loved seeing the creative things my hubs and kiddos have come up with in past years. Well, except for that one year where the hubs broke my blender in April and then gave ME a new one for Mother's Day...what in the world?? Ha!

My favorite gift was a cross that the hubs help eWe paint and put glitter on for my cross wall! I cherish that and she still knows that it was something special she did for me. Precious!

So, while it may be quite sad....I'm praying for myself and so many other women who find this day hard for various reasons....that the truths of the cross will put our happiness out of the reach or our sorrows....that we could trade our sorrows, our pain, our anger and bitterness, our loneliness or despair all in. That we could lay it all down for the joy of the Lord. My favorite verse for quite some time is Nehemiah 8:10, "..for the joy of the Lord is my strength." May that be true for all of us this Sunday.

By the way....does anyone want to share what their favorite Mother's Day gift to give or receive has been?

Oh what a day...

sometimes i just feel like its an all lowercase day. i've not even got the emotional energy to push shift. it's the whole parenting gig that sends me in a tailspin. i just feel like how my kids are doing is such a direct reflection on how i am parenting them. i know, i know....you are shaking your heads at me saying that its not true. but i bet you feel the same way, right?
well, at any rate, today was one of those days that i felt like an utter failure. eWe is a precious child. But she is mighty dramatic, annoyingly emotional about everything and nothing, and recently has decided to forget all the basic rules of respect and obedience that we've seemingly been drilling into her for almost 5 years. she almost acts like its a game when i give her instruction....like she can smile and not obey right away and that will be funny. i hate it for you sister, but i ain't laughin'. not even on the inside. ugh. and since when does our rule that "you never solve your problems with your hands" go flying out the window? this is day 5 of having pushed her brother. granted he's deserved it, technically speaking.....he's just such a little brother, ya know? but regardless, your responses still have to be based on the holy spirit not your flesh, little one. double ugh.

so, unfortunately for her today she met her match. i sent her to her bed to "think about it". that is something i had to do as a kid and never really understood what i was to do with myself. so, why did i send her? well, first off...if i didn't i might have been tempted to hang her by her toes. and besides that...well i just was at a loss as to what else to try. in an effort to improve the process (no offense mom and dad), i did go in and give her specific bullet points to think on. oh, c'mon, you would expect nothing less from me...miss type A, right? (notice i did make the "A" an uppercase just b/c i know its true of me). At any rate, it seems to have penetrated her little heart some.

her actions at dinner were much better. she also lost other special priveledges (dessert, webkin usage indefinitely, etc), which may have been the straw that broke the camels back persay...who knows.

now, my sweet daughter, is sitting in her room for the remainder of the evening copying, "obey your parents in the Lord" (he gets an uppercase too) and "do unto others and you would have done to you" 5x. if you know her at all, though, she probably is kind of enjoying this part. she loves to do work and learn....seriously. but, i'm still hoping that this afternoon will stick with her for a while. if not, well there are always 10 other options....her toes!

Recycle Life

So today has been jammed packed....pancake bfast to raise money for eWe's school, followed by a charity walk/run/bike, followed by a baby shower for a friend. The cause was for organ donation...a great one! So, I just wanted to give a shout out and ask if you all are donors? If not, would you consider it? Recycle life!

Unlocking the mystery....

So my sister is at her ultrasound right now finding out what #4 will be...boy or girl. I asked my 4 year old, eWe, what she thought it would be. She said "girl" and that they should call her "flower". I think if my sis gets a girl she'll be happy to name it just about anything:) (her boys have been more difficult than her girl thus far). Anyway, so eWe wanted to know how they could see the baby inside her aunt. So, we talked about the ultrasound a little. Then the convo went like this:

eWe: Mom, how can they tell it's a girl or a boy?
me: Well, what is different about a boy and a girl?
eWe: A boy's hair is shorter.
me: So you mean if I cut your hair you'd be a boy?
eWe: Noooooooooo, Mom. I'd still have my eWe face.
me: Okay, what else is different about boys and girls?
eWe: Ummm...boys wear "car" clothes.
me: Well, if I put a "car" shirt on you would you be a boy?
eWe: Noooooooooooooo, Mom.
me: Besides, eWe...babies don't wear clothes before they are born, and some don't have hair.
eWe: Oh, I got it (very serious about her discovery)...girls like pink flowers and boys like orange flowers.
me: eWe...the baby doesn't have any flowers in your aunt's "belly" and it can't talk to tell us it's preferences. Besides, I like orange flowers...am I a boy?
eWe: Noooooooooooo, Mom!
me: eWe, what do you and your brother have that is different from one another that makes you a girl and him a boy?
eWe: I don't know....toys?
(oh my gracious, we are getting no where! but I sure am cracking up!)
me: I want you to think about boys and girls' bodies...what's different?
eWe: Ummm...that our birthdays are not the same?
me: Huh? Where is your brain?
eWe: Hold on, I'm going to go get it and get it ready.
me: Oh my! Okay, last try...what is different about little man's body?
eWe: Think, think, think...I don't know...that I'm bigger than him and have tan skin?
me: No eWe!
eWe: okay, no more thinking. I'm not doing any more and I'm not going to pay attention.
me: Okay last question (i know, i know...i said that already). What do you and little man do differently to go potty?
(the light bulb goes off...finally! too funny!)

Winding down Spring Break

So this is officially our last day of Spring Break. I'm so thankful eWe's school always gives you an extra day to recoup from travel...nice perk. We had a great trip to KY and TN. My cup of friendship overflows! I'll try to put the pics on the slide show. Here are the kiddos in their Easter duds. Amazingly, eWe's dress from last year still fit. It was the last gift my sweet Mom purchased for her so it was certainly special to be able to wear it again.

Easter

I've traveled back to KY for Spring Break and was able to get a few more things we'd left behind in the move. One of the things I picked up were our Resurrection Eggs. It's funny how well they help to get the message of Easter across in a memorable way. As I pulled them out yesterday to go through them with "eWe" she said, "I remember those from last year, Mom. We talked about the donkey and stuff on our couch in KY when we lived there, right?" Right! I'm so glad that something stuck with her. But this year she was way more into it....she wanted to know how if Jesus got his blood and water back (that came out when they pierced his side to ensure he was dead) when he was resurrected. WOW...what a great question! Well "eWe", the blood and water did prove that He was in fact dead. And his resurrection wasn't just a spiritual one, it was physical as well....so I'd say "yes". But, in all my 33 years I've never thought of that before.

At any rate, while today is worthy of words....I have just seven. Thank you, Jesus! You have risen indeed!

"But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed." "HE HAS RISEN!"

What about now?

So, with the help of my big sis I just added some music to the blog. The song playing is "What about now" by Daughtry. You (all two of my blog readers) may have noticed it was in my playlist that I ran to the other day. While I was running there was one verse in particular, and part of the chorus that really stuck out to me....

The sun is breaking in your eyes
To start a new day.
This broken heart can still survive
With a touch of your grace.
Shadows fade into the light.
I am by your side,
Where love will find you.

What about now?
What about today?
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?

Some of you know that this year has been full of change for me...yes, most importantly my Mom's death.....hence the reference to a "broken heart". But, recently I've felt the truth in these words...that the sun is beginning to break, and that it's the start of a new day. But, it's only with a touch of His grace that these shadows of pain and sorrow are beginning to fade. It's the reminder that He is by my side loving me each and every step of the way.

And yeah, Mr. Chris Daughtry....you've nailed it..."What about now?"....

Well, not that it is directly related...although it is to me.....but I've been working on a personal goal of mine, pretty intensely....getting fit, losing weight, etc. Hence the running:) And, when I began this journey, I made a private decision to do it in honor of my Mom. One, because later in her life she struggled with her weight and thus self-image. But, also because I felt that it would be something she would want me to be free of...this battle with not liking who I am. And, for those of you who read this blog (again, all two of you) you know that my motto for the year is "Thirty-three....Being me! Being Free!" So, I opted to set a goal to lose a total of 61 lbs....one for each year of my Mom's life. Now that I've begun, though, I'm not sure if it will be possible b/c I'm losing inches due to weight training. I may get close and feel like any further won't be healthy, but we'll see. Right now I'm 26 lbs. down. I opted to share this now b/c if I waited until the end it might have seemed like an afterthought that it was in her honor. So there you have it. And, that brings me full circle to the end of Mr. Daughtry's song...."What if you are making me all that I was meant to be?" I feel empowed in this endeavor, and wonder what He's going to use it for...me for. Whatever it may be, I pray that it might glorify Him and honor my Mom.

"The whole is other than the sum of its parts." (Koffka)

Single Ladies Put a Ring on it (Beyonce)
Home (Daughtry)
Ready to Run (Dixie Chicks)
Callin' Baton Rouge (Garth Brooks)
Carolina in My Mind (James Taylor)
Morning Song (Jewel)
Sunrays and Saturdays (Vertical Horizon)
Least Complicated (Indigo Girls)
Bubbly (Colbie Caillat)
What about Now (Daughtry)
Wide Open Space (Dixie Chicks)
I'll Be (Edwin McCain)
Put Your Records On (Corinne Bailey Rae)
Take My Breath Away (Emma Bunton)
Power of Two (Indigo Girls)

To many these "parts" may just seem like a fun, throw back playlist from my ipod. But, to me, today it is a "whole" lot more (pun intended). It represents 5 miles of running. I've always wanted to run, enjoy it, etc....but never have. This is the first time in my life that I can actually say that I get it....I get why people enjoy it, why they push themselves to go farther and be faster. Wednesday I went out and did 3.2, today it was 5....it makes me feel fit, capable, and motivated to push myself even harder next time. Love that! It's kind of like a game to me now. I have to give props to Dawn for helping me figure out the heart rate bit, to Leslie for helping realize it was 99% mental, and to Erin for inspiring me by just picking up and training for a half. It takes a whole village people, it really does! Ha!

Our Creative Side

Little man decided to kill some time on one of our Wednesday PJ days by playing with silly putty. He exclaimed, "Mom! Look! I made a person!" So, here is a picture of him sculpting and proudly displaying his creation.













And here is our little miss on the back porch "practicing her tricks" so she can "join the circus".
















And last but not least....I'd hate to leave out the hubs (and Poppy, although not pictured here)....here he is building a bunk room in the attic. Right now it's just framing, drywalling, sanding and painting...but it promises to be a grandkids' dream come true!

Never a dull moment when the creative juices start flowing around here. Watch out world! Ha!

The short-handed update........

Well, once again I've let time slip by. I've been recovering from an injury, scrapbooking, knitting, going to Disney, visiting with Cat, turning 33, starting a new Bible study, celebrating the hubs' bday, meeting with my new precious friend/mentor Caryl, suffering through shingles, nursing sick kiddos, working out, praying for my sweet nephew J (as he was hurt and in the hospital for DAYS), sending wishes to my sis-in-law/dear friend for her 30th, doing the normal daily grind, and well I guess that does it! Or maybe I forgot a few things?

Now, I'm gearing up for the next wave of "life"....celebrating 7 years with the hubs, traveling to a family reunion, finding out what my sis is having (baby #4), having Mar and Tucker visit, and returning to Disney! I'm sure there'll be more mixed in there...there always is, right! Ha!

So that's the short-handed version of life for us.

Now for the short-handed version of my heart....Well, God has been convicting me and stripping me (slowly) of my perfectionism and my people-pleasing "junk". He's been teaching me to serve for all the right reasons (not that I'm doing it yet). He's been teaching me to hold my tongue when others offend me. He's been teaching me to care more about what He thinks of me, and helping me to be more free to be the person He's created me to be. There's a lot more behind all of that, but that sums it up.

And, that brings me to my motto for my Thirty-third year....."Being Free at Thirty-Three". Silly? Maybe. I just want to experience more of Him and what He has for me rather than being tied to doing, saying, and being what others think I should do, say, and be.

And, now for my new life motto courtesy of Erma Brombeck:
"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, "I used everything you gave me."

Yes, that's what I am asking and trusting Him for each day...that by the time I put my head on the pillow I would have used it all....all that He entrusted to me for that day! Pray with me on this one as you think of me!

Do any of you have life mottos and verses? I'd love to hear them!

Navigating Nature

It was a bit chilly (for Florida) yesterday...low 50s...but I still felt like we needed to get out of the house. So, after hitting the Y with the kiddos, we checked out some nature trails that a major local resort offers. It worked out well that they were paved. They led to the beach too, which was a fun surprise ending for them. In typical fashion, E had to be the leader. She is such a firstborn female! She even took over the map (fortunate for me there was only one way there and back). Also in typical fashion, C had to find the biggest, most dangerous stick to carry along as his "weapon", "tool", and ultimately "souvenir". Somehow I convinced him to exchange his stick for a map at the end so the car ride home was more manageable. Those two crack me up!

We went, we saw, and we considered joining....

The circus! Chad took all of us to Zing Zang Zoom yesterday! It was our kid's first time to go to the circus, and it was F-U-N! They read about them in books, but they couldn't have imagined the realness of the excitement, danger, and fun! E was especially thrilled. She had to cover her mouth and eyes half them time because she just couldn't believe things were possible or because she couldn't stand the anticipation! I loved it! It was so magical....it made us all feel like kids again!

The failures, struggles, and desires the person they call "Mom"!

We've had a lot of fun already this new year. But, the day in and day out of being a mom can truly be a struggle for me. Mostly because I desire to do it well, and always fear that I'm setting my kids up for years of counseling! Ha! I'm certain that if I would not give over to my flesh, pray more throughout the day, take deeper breaths and just let go of the little things it would be much better. Not too much to ask or expect, right? HA!

I will say, though....when I stop and look at their precious faces, when I hold them in my arms, when I watch them sleeping....I get it. None of it matters and I just need to chill out. I need to some how find a way to not let their repetitive questions, their current blaring sin/discipline issues, and their emotional drama get to me. That is but a mere blink of my day. I need to focus on the precious children God created them to be, and the AMAZING people He's training them to become. I'm part of that process, and I need to glorify Him in my role. You can pray for me as you think of it...I know it will be a continued journey for sure, but I really want to take the time to surrender this to Him and pray my way through it. How could I not?

Visit with Miss Nicole

Last week marked our first visit from a friend since having moved to Florida...Miss Nicole! It was such a great time of connection and fun for all of us. She is getting ready to embark on a 6 month trip to Nimibia, Africa in order to serve with African Inland Missions (A.I.M). It is such a great privilege to be a part of her team and pray her through this time. If you think of her, and our other dear friend Tricia who will be with her, please pray for them....for protection, fruitfulness in both their lives and in their ministry, and for both Nimibia and their own hearts to be left changed forever.

MLK Choir

We had the privilege this year to participate in a MLK celebration. Emily sang in a musical with other children, most (if not all) of whom were African-American. It was amazing on so many levels....coming together with others who are different from us, supporting our community in it's entirety rather than the pieces that we fit into "best", and truly stopping to honor a man who changed the face of our nation and our world. Emily also loved, on the simplest level, making new friends and singing. She did a great job with her line, "predjudice or injustice"! Here she is dressed and ready to go and one of her at the performance.

Being faithful in the little things....

I just read about the life of Betty Olsen who was a missionary nurse that traveled to Vietnam during the war. That in and of itself is amazing, right? But, what was most amazing about her is that she was captured, mistreated, and yet all the while she tended to the other captives, shared Christ with them, and then with her dying words told her captives of her and God's love for them...no matter that they had tortured and killed her. Stinkin' AMAZING, right?

I struggle a little in reading that because I feel like what I do each and every day will never amount to much for the Lord. I haven't been called to some war torn remote village (yet), I haven't been taken captive (even if some days I feel trapped by the world's demands), and I don't have any true enemies to speak of (although I am a pain in the #@& and I'm sure I'm often not people's favorite or have let them down). I want so desperately to leave a handprint on this world...not for my glory, but for HIS! I want my life to be story-worthy...again, not with my name attached. It could just be that someone writes, "Once there was this woman...". I just want to make a difference. I know, I know...I have been called to the high honor of motherhood, and being a wife. And I do consider that a blessing. I want to disciple my children and love on my hubs. Truly!

But, is that enough? Believe me, I'm not asking to be malnourished with leeches hanging from my legs....but, I do want to use all that I am. And, the sigh of relief comes for me when I finally get it...that's all Nurse Betty wanted too. She didn't set out to be a martyr for the faith. She set out to be faithful in the small things. She obeyed the call to become a nurse, which led her to a job, that led her to a church, that led her to a ministry, that led her to Vietnam, etc.

So, today I suppose I will obey the call to spend time with the Lord, look for ways to serve my family, reach out to love others in my life, and pray that today He would teach me a little more about living my life in light of my faith.

Our ADVENTure

Well, so much for consistently keeping up this blog! Life! I have to admit, I'm always a dreamer when it comes to the vast amount I'd like to accomplish. Alas!

Anyway, we are enjoying all the fun activities around town...a trolley ride downtown, the Christmas parade, cookie baking, etc. But, now that the kids are old enough to "get it", Advent has become my favorite time in this season. Every night....well when we can remember and get it together in time....we have been reading a little advent story and moving Mary and Joseph closer to the manger as the take their journey to Bethlehem. Somehow, this story that I've heard over and over again has seemingly new meaning to me as I watch it take hold in my kiddos eyes.

We had the privilege of lighting the Advent candle at church last week, and our picture was put in the paper. And while that in and of itself is just a neat advantage of small island living, what's even cooler is what our Pastor said to the kiddos today....that everything they do is a witness to others and a way for them to tell others about Christ. So, my prayer is that they'll talk about what we are doing at home and well, so will I! Waiting anxiously for Christ!!!!